Women are not naturally attracted to the naked male body in the way that males are stimulated by female nakedness. But don’t think that pornography is therefore only a male problem! Here are some disturbing facts that every dad, husband, and church leader need to know.(Story and statistics taken from www.covenanteyes.com)
It was just another normal day, doing homework after school. While doing research, 13-year-old Jessica Harris was intrigued by a particular video she found online. The thumbnail image was dark and blurry, but it grabbed her attention. After pressing the play button, Jessica found herself watching pornography for the first time in her life. Those 3 minutes and 23 seconds were etched on her brain, and this incident became the beginning of an eight-year-long secret fascination with porn and cybersex.
- Nearly ½ of young adult women today believe viewing pornography is acceptable behavior.
- About 1 in 4 girls has sat down to watch Internet pornography for at least a half-hour straight.
- One in 7 girls has done this on multiple occasions.
- Nearly one third of young adult women intentionally use pornography from time to time.
- 18% of women intentionally use pornography every week.
Covenant Eyes conducted a survey with a forum of Christian woman who struggle with sexual temptation. Their research revealed that among women over 45, 80% were first exposed to pornography through the print media. Of those under 17, 90% were first exposed to porn through the Internet.
Women, like men are sucked into the underworld of lust in many ways. It could be innocently stumbling upon a sexual image online but then being curious about it and clicking the link. It could be happening upon erotica—the written version of porn, in a college English class. Many young women are introduced to porn by their boyfriends who want to watch it together to get her turned on before sex.
Whatever the avenue, the result is the same. The images stimulate sexual arousal in women just as they do in men. The soul is then stamped with a hunger for the same kind of stimulation again. “Women can still become addicted to pornography in the same way that men do,” says Dr. Doug Weiss,, a pioneer in sex addiction therapy. The problems of regular use of pornography among women are the same as they are among men; it eventually makes real sex less satisfying in marriage, and diminishes the power of sexual intimacy to bind together the couple’s hearts.
How to Protect Our Daughters
1. Talk to her (perhaps with your wife) about the purpose and pleasure of sex.
- Talk early—before adolescence.
- Talk positively—sex is a wonderful, rich blessing to be valued and protected.
- Talk openly—encourage her to ask questions.
- Talk soberly--about the destructive result of sex outside of marriage. Sex is like a fire kept in the home fireplace, sometimes warm cozy embers, sometimes a blazing flame, but in both cases providing warmth at the center of the family. However,when it is taken outside the home it becomes a raging destructive forest fire.
2. Talk about pornography.
- Talk about nakedness—it belongs in the privacy of marital love, not in the streets.
- Talk about sexual arousal—how she can be sexually aroused by erotic words, erotic images, and even sincere words of a boy who professes to love her.
- Talk about lust—about how powerful sexual and romantic fantasies can be.
- Talk about the danger of sexual addiction—how pornography “supercharges” our fantasies and how, like a drug addiction, the more we see the more we want to see.
3. Keep filling her emotional tank.
- Remind her of the gospel—that she is a far worse sinner than her sexual sins reveal but at the same time more loved than she ever dared imagine.
- Praise her character—catch her doing something well and tell her!
- Tell her often that you love her—and give her lots of hugs.
- Get into her world—by being interested in her friends asking good questions about her day.
4. Protect her
- Refuse to consume sexual media yourself.
- For your children, be sure all of your computers have an Internet filter.
- To your teen, explain the danger of the Internet as an avenue through which millions, including women, have become addicted to pornography.
- Explain the biblical principle of accountability to your teens. Help them choose an accountability partner.
- Put accountability software such as Covenant Eyes on your teens’ phones or tablets that have Internet capability.
