“The stakes are too high, the battle too fierce, the enemy too wily, the attacks too frequent, the cost of defeat too severe for any Christian man to fight his spiritual battles alone.”  Gary Yagel, Forging Bonds of Brotherhood

All Christian men fight inner battles with their sinful nature.  Lust, anger, selfishness, pride, resentment, jealousy, impatience, discontent, idolatry are just some of the forces that seek to overpower us as men.  Many times we lose these battles for a  simple reason—we are trying to fight them by ourselves.

Whether fighting in the street or fighting in Iraq, men know they are likely to become a casualty if they fight alone.  The same principle holds true with the battles of our inner lives. Yet most Christian men are fighting their spiritual battles alone.  Not long ago, a survey was taken of over 120,000 Christian men, who were asked, “Do you have a best friend?”  An astonishing 95% answered, “No.”  Nineteen out of twenty Christian men in our country are so disconnected that they have no best friend.

Scripture reveals a profound truth that explains why so many Christian men are losing spiritual battles in the twenty-first century.  "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.  A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Ecc.4:9-12 

Christian men are born to be warriors and called to wage a fierce, three-front battle.  We must daily battle the enemy within, our sinful nature, which relentlessly seeks to overpower us.  We must resist a world that continually bombards us with enticements that would take our hearts captive and turn us into traitors to our sovereign, Jesus Christ. We must engage a spiritual enemy who wants to “rob, and kill, and destroy” us and our loved ones (John 10:10.)  Yet, nineteen out of twenty Christian men are alone in their battles.

Those fighting alone even include many men in small group studies with other men. They study the Bible together, but often don’t risk sharing where their true spiritual battles lie. Do you have someone fighting beside you in your spiritual battles?  Do you have anyone who even knows what your spiritual battles are?

But how do you find a few close friends to help you in your spiritual battles?  The answer is that you may not be able to FIND them; you may need to FORGE them. The Forging Bonds of Brotherhood material available at this website is designed specifically to do that.  It presents the biblical support for the truth that God never intended Christian men to fight their spiritual battles alone. It gives a practical understanding of how trust is built in a relationship because trust is the foundation of all friendship and accountability. It also provides the tools required to forge lasting friendships with a few brothers who will love you, encourage you, stand beside you in your spiritual battles, and watch your back.

Not only is the sixty page Forging Bonds of Brotherhood a fun, easy read for an individual; it is also designed to be used as a small group Bible study. If you currently attend such a group, by reading and discussing it together you can forge the foundation of trust with the other group members required to become true brothers in the battle.

For more information about the book, Forging Bonds of Brotherhood click here.

To find out how Gary can inspire and assist the men in your church to become a true band of brothers click here.



The most common venue for helping men get connected in today’s church is a men’s bible study.  However, it is very unusual for a church to have more than 10-20% of their men in small groups.  If we are to help the majority of our men get connected in the twenty-first century, we need to think outside of the box.

Today’s men, who are committed to a regular discipline in their lives  like working out, would prefer to do that as a part of their work day instead of coming home from work and then going back out.  Part of the Forging Bonds of Brotherhood material is designed with this fact in mind.

Our Check 6 partnerships are for 2-4 guys who meet for a sixty minute meeting.  Such meetings usually take place at breakfast before work, at lunch, or in a once a week phone call to an old friend. The agenda for this one-hour meeting is not studying the Bible directly, but answering a series of questions that enable men to discuss how they are seeking to apply the Bible in their everyday lives.  Such groups are:

Not a couples’ group, but a band of brothers
Not a 2 hour Bible study, but a 1 hour breakfast, lunch, or phone call
Not an evening away from your family,  but an hour from your work day
Not 6-8 guys, but 2-4 guys
Not focused on learning, but focused on fighting
Not a meeting agenda that generates opinions, but a meeting agenda that generates connection as brothers.

The agenda for guys who are just getting started comes in a pocket tri-fold called, Forging A Foundation. The agenda for a  deeper level commitment with accountability comes in a pocket tri-fold called, Check 6. These questions generate 95% encouragement along with the 5% of accountability that we all know we need.

Neither pocket tri-fold is sold separately. They both come with the booklet, Forging Bonds of Brotherhood. However you can click here for a free download of the Check 6 questions.